Twisted and Broken Down!

It's 4:30 am... Do you know where you are?

I am home... On Saturday night... I went to my friend Pascal's tonight... had a wonderful visit with him and his boyfriend... I was told I have a great energy...

I had a delightful conversation with a friend how just started a new relationship.... I am overjoyed for him...

Things have changed so much lately... Friends moving away... me moving.. friends buying houses... having babies... drifting apart from other friends...

I just feel so honored to know some of the people who are in my life.... I have met some of the most interesting, intelligent, beautiful people on the planet in my many adventures.... Unfortunately some people are meant to slip in a nd out of our lives....

I want to tell you about what has been going on with me lately... but I can't... I don't' know how to put these things into words... I don't' know where to begin... I don't' know how to make you understand.. I am not sure I understand...

My parents are supposed to be coming down in April for my cousin Jennifer's wedding... is part of growing up... growing apart... Family is so important to me... yet half my family is almost the entire way across the country....

I am so vulnerable today.. I really am a bleeding heart, liberal hippy... I bitch about things... but what do I do to change them.... I am aware of the crap in the world... what am I doing to rectify the situation... can we all plead ignorance...

I am struggling... stumbling.... I am applying for Mount Allison next week... I have calendars from 8 different Canadian universities.... I got my first job babysitting when I was twelve... I got my first "real" job when I was 15... I have since worked at more than 10 different places... I am excited to go to school... to dig my heels in and devote my mind to educating myself...
I washed his dishes... I am such a woman....
I wish I could be a writer.. I wish I could sit down and spew out my jumbled thoughts and ideas into some sort of concise and constructive writing...

Peace Sells but whose buying.....

Ex boyfriend that I broke up with on Valentines of 2001 called my parents looking for my number... talked to my mother for 45 minutes... we dated for almost 2 years... I think this is incredibly bizarre....

How do I explain my trains of thoughts... where is the correlation....

Metal Gods is my favorite song right now... I could listen to it endlessly... when he kicks in with "Meeeeeeeeetaaaaaaaallll Gods"... and the marching with the whip cracking.... something hypnotizing and slightly erotic about the voice singing those words...

I watched Million dollar Babies tonight... hated it... and now that I think about it more... I hated Mystic River too... Hate.... it was supposed to pull heart strings and whatever... and I am a big cry baby... and blech... I love Morgan Freeman (is that his given name... cause now that I think more about it... that's kinda cool)

I watched Swimming with Sharks last week too... sucked ass... the stupid Esteban blind guitar selling dude commercial was better...

I am going to watch Labyrinth this week sometime... no expectations at all....

This is what happens when I don't blog for a while I get into overload....

I got a library card... New book... it's Ginormous... I want to visit the Moncton Museum next...

I have over 150 gmail invites.... does anyone anywhere know of anyone who wants some?

Sam, sorry for the long email... I had to gush to someone lol....