Jamie

the majority of my exams are completed. I wrote my Environmental
studies one this morning and I am pretty sure I got an A perhaps even
well hopefully an A+.. I wrote my history one.. My mind went totally
blank and I think I bombed it...I could say, "can't win them all" but that
would be such a cop out....

I am laying on Laura's floor typing this on her snazzy laptop.. I was
discussing with her something Chris and I talked about on Monday
night... I view myself as being inferior because I am a woman.. When I
discuss being female I do so in a derogatory fashion.. I am ashamed of
my femininity.. I constantly rag on (pun intended) about my female qualities being weak..
I need to embrace who I am... It's purely cultural... Women are viewed
as inferior globally and I have adopted that idea... It took me 24
years and 2 months to realize that I am ashamed of being a "girl."

So I usually do this "time of the month" post bitching and whining
about being a girl and myself.. Instead this month I am going to focus
on what I like about myself and being a woman.

Why Jamie enjoys herself :

1. My eyes.. I have beautiful blue eyes that change from light blue, to
deep blue to grey.. They are one of my best features and I tend to
hide them behind my glasses.
2. Keeping with that I have lovely long eyelashes.
3. Breasts- they are big, round, pierced and I love them.
4. My legs, long, strong and ooo so smooth when they are freshly
shaven.. I love the muscles in my calves and thighs.... I am fortunate that they
still work well.
5. My scars- they are a reminder of where I have been and where I am
going.. They are a history of me and the things I have accomplished
and the troubles I have faced.
6. My hair.. Its long, dark and a perfect curtain to hide behind or
flip open for the world to see my
7. Face which is filled with
8. Freckles.. I despised them when I was younger, now I am beginning to
appreciate the wonder of the freckles that speckle my face, arms
shoulders and even my chest.. Not too many yet they become this lovely
coating in the summer.
9. My nose, my grandmother made fun of it when I was younger.. I
realized in my late teens it was because it was her nose, and she
didn't like her own nose.. I think it's cute it has a little round
ball at the tip that gives it a fun shape.
10. My lips have this cute little dip at the top that make the shape
of my lips more defined.
11. My teeth, the top ones are so straight and I have never worn
braces.. The bottom ones are slightly crooked but that is what gives my
smile character and it's shine.
12. My strong arms that though are still too "gooey" for my liking
have this amazing muscle tone underneath and when I flex them a certain
way the tone is emphasized and feels really wicked.
13. My tummy.. With it's own scar and my little round belly button that
is sensitive.. Though my stomach needs a lot of toning and to be not so
round.. I enjoy it nonetheless.
14. My feet are fun, they are tough, keeping me moving even when I
stuff them into obscenely uncomfortable shoes.
15. My long slender fingers that help me type out these delightful posts.
16. My baby-maker... For obvious reasons.. It is the source of my
greatest pleasures and my GREATEST pain (that's to that troublesome
car accident and a incompetent doctor.)
17. My fingernails.. I have woman nails now.. I stopped biting them
over a year ago and I love tapping them on things and scratching an
itch has become very enjoyable experience ever since.
18. My brain.. Though I am still trying to figure out exactly how it
works so I can maximize it's potential.
19. My bottom ( said with an snooouuutty English accent) .. Another thing I used to be ashamed of.. Now I am enjoying it's roundness.
20. My skin, soft, and oh so very pale.. Another thing I used to
hate.. Now I enjoy complimenting it with various fabrics.. Maintaining
it with various soaps and moisturizing to keep it smooth and
touchable.


yea.. I like getting to know me again to enjoy, who I am! AND all the pieces that make me "Jamie".