I am an idiot

that is all!

I was rudely awaken by my alarm clock at 10 am.. I hit snooze.. but then the phone start to ring, I hopped out of bed thinking no one else was home to answer it. Proceeded to throw on my scrubs I opened my bedroom door just as my dad picked up the phone... He was home.. I didn't have to get out of bed so damn early..

I was awake I was upright, may as well go to the bathroom and brush my teeth wash my face.. blech I started getting ready for work.. When I finished my morning routine, I popped online and started writing a letter to Jerome. The phone rings again and it's Laura telling me they are on their way to pick me up... I forgot to put on socks, I quickly close my screen only to realize I clicked on the wrong screen and close the letter,m therefore erasing everything I had just wrote... so irritating. Then I pull on my socks, grab my kicks and I am out the door off to work..

Laura and MJ were late arriving so I was late getting to work, Except as I am walking through the door Dawn and Jenn both give me strange looks, and I am wondering why Jenn is working since she isn't scheduled till tonight... EXCEPT I am a moron and I am the one not scheduled till tonight.. I call home and get my dad and Fred (my dad's friend) to come pick me up. I end up back home, where I spend the afternoon doing absolutely nothing except some laundry and cooking some food. I made some very tasty shrimpies... Yummy for the shrimpies. Lemon garlic... yum yum.

It was a rather dreary day. I work till close tonight.. I hope it's busy, but not TOO busy... Just enough that I make a shitload of money... That would be awesome. Only because I ma getting closer and closer to getting my bills all paid off and I really want to have my bills all paid off.

My parents have just returned home, supper is being prepared and I should be getting ready for work. I have to pick my courses for school. Any suggestions?

Raspy Smurf

Smurf me!

Love this

Emo anyone?

Quizerrfic

Yea Yea Yea, I know I know... blah blah blah... here:

1. What time did you get up this morning? Ugh. The alarm went off at 9:01 am, I hit snooze twice, had to be to work for 10 am.

2. Diamonds or pearls? Diamonds or pearls with white gold.

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? Not telling EVER!

4. What did you have for breakfast? Bison burger (it was 2pm)

5. Your favorite shirt? Flowered Halter with built in bra.

6. What is your favourite cuisine? Salmon or lemon garlic shrimp.

7. What foods do you dislike? brown beans, liver and lobster.

8. What is your favourite chip flavour? Sour Cream and Bacon.

9. What is your favourite CD at the moment?

10. Favourite sandwich? bologna cheese slice, honey mustard, mayo on red river cereal bread (lightly toasted)

11. What characteristics do you despise? Assholiness, ignorance, stupidity, rudeness, two-face-iness

12. Favourite item of clothing? My black goth princess skirt skirt.

13. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation, where would you go? Scotland.

14. What colour is your bathroom? I am homeless for the moment. (My parents bathroom is white...)

15. Favourite brand of clothing? MXM

16. Where would you retire to? Somewhere near clean water and mountains.

17. Favourite time of day? The times I'm not working. Like now.

18. What was your most memorable birthday? My 16th, my mom made it extra special because I attended a funeral on my 15th, and my 21st, because I got to spend it with a bunch of great people, at the bar I was working at, practically everyone who walked through the door bought me a drink.

19. Where were you born? Sydney, NS

20. Favourite sport to watch? Hockey live.

21. Who do you least expect to comment on this? YOU!

22. Person you expect to send you a million more of these quiz things? Megs

23. What fabric detergent do you use? Umm...Sunlight

24. Coke or Pepsi? Pepsi

25. Are you a morning person or night owl? I'm an night owl..

26. What is your shoe size? depends on manufacturer... 8ish

27. Do you have any pets? Just my sex slaves... I mean no...

28. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share with your family and friends? I am volunteering at a race track this weekend. I miss the ocean, and I am in the middle of watching the first two seasons of Trailer Park Boys on DVD... made me almost peed my bed last night. My Dad flew to Nova Scotia to pick up my car, and he drove it back here for my brother (because he bought it). When he returned he told me he had a gift for me form my aunt... it's was a long lost cream coloured bra of mine... must have left it there when I first moved to Moncton I stayed there... I promptly lost it again...

29. Do you miss me? Yes

30. What are you reading right now? Beyond Fate- Margret Visser

Where have all the Cowboys gone?

My last day off was June 5th, my next day off is June 25th... I have tons to write about... I miss you. I am off work tonight... If y'all would like I could update... It's weird but I think a lot of people read this... but no one comments anymore... I miss little hellos from all my friends (oh wait... I don't have any friends).


I must get off to work... I wear a white dress shirt, a black tie, black pants, black socks and black shoes to work... I even wear a shiny nametag, and have to weigh my liquor at the beginning of my shift, if I work a night have to weigh it at the end... Think they are paranoid much?

If I make a mistake I get to drink whatever it is, unfortunately for me... I use mess up on ceasars... Which are gross..

Ok Must go get ready for work.

Thank You

"Don't it always seem to go
That you don't know what you've got
Till it's gone"

I was going to tell you about my day, how much I have been working, strange things that have happened... Weird thoughts that have passed through my head...

Until I read this, and my post has changed and I wanted to tell you about Heather.

I have never met Heather in person, though perhaps some day I will have that opportunity, but I did get a little glimpse into her life, as told through her blog. As some of you may already know I have an addiction to blogs, I love to read them, especially love Broad at Bat.

Broad (aka Heather) would write stuff that made me sit up and go YEA! or Damn Straight! Sometimes I would cry or giggle, sometimes I would feel compelled to write her an email (which I refrained from doing so except on rare occasions).

She has faced some trials and hardships and managed to stay pretty optimistic through them, she has a great perspective, and a superb sense of humor. Sometimes her posts just changed my whole outlook on my day. She has faced similar circumstances in her life as I had in mine, and I felt like I could identify with her.

She inspired me, and she has been a sort of "mentor" it always brighten my day when she would drop a quick note of encouragement, or just a quick hello in my comments or email.

It is with downcast eyes and somber face I tell you that she has decided to end her blog..... I am heartbroken and will miss her updates.

If you were also a fan you will understand my dismal state... If not you missed some fan-fucking-tastic writing my friends, by a fabulous lady, whose rants, raves and rational I will miss entirely too much.

Heather, if you happen to read this silly little site anymore... I just wanted to say Thanks.

natural spring water

I think I am changing out here.
I think I am getting old.
I think I am what I want.
I think I am an idiot.

When I was 15 I wrote this :

The fear of being alone has overwhelmed me.
The fear of being unloved has consumed me.
The fear of death has overpowered me.
The fear of being a failure has trapped me.
I must rise above it and face
My Destiny.

It still applies...

Home is where the Head is.

COMMENTS?

Sleepy Time

I found my missing friend again.

-That's relieving.

I have touched up my red hair.

- I love red hair it "feels" sexy.

I am only working two jobs.

-They keep me busy.

My Dad flies out tomorrow to pick up my car and drive it back here.

-I am super appreciative.

It's very difficult sometimes to be the bigger person.

-I want to tear some people to shreds.

I have had postcards sitting in my room for two weeks that I have to fill out and mail.

- I miss you.

Men in committed relationships (ie married) are horribly unattractive.

-especially if they flirt with you like they are single.

I feel incredibly insecure today.

-tomorrow will be better so I'll quit whining.

I am paying off my bills.

-It feels amazing.

Laura and I went to see "The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants"

-It had a lot of potential, and BLEW it.

I love the smell of lilacs.

-I miss the sun shining on the ocean.

I went babysitting on Saturday afternoon.

- Exhausting.

When guys ask to buy me a drink and I hold up a bottle of water.....

-That should be a HINT!

Drunk Newfies are much harder to understand than sober ones.

-Though they are still fairly cute.

I went to a "beer garden" on Saturday night, was there long enough to watch guy hit a cop, get thrown to the ground by 5 cops and still struggle as one put his knee on his throat while the rest held him down and cuffed him.

-No comment.

My knee still hurts from when I wiped out at the Capri...

-I have to stop being such a klutz.

Laura always runs into the bathroom the exact moment I was heading there.

-It's baffling.

I am getting new piercings while I am here, and I don't think you can even get them in the East Coast.

-Very psyched.

There are 7928 hits on my site since last December.....

-shocking and scary.

Bullet Belt

"time to let you know. Time to sit here and say:
I know we are... We are the lucky ones.
I know we are... We are the lucky ones.
I know we are... We are the lucky ones."

I may be part of a pit crew or a flagman, at a car race... HOW COOL IS THAT! I may even be the start/stop girl... and I get to wear a headset and talk to the guys racing.... I have never been to a race track before...

Sunday I get to go see LIVE chuck wagon races... I am thrilled to bits... I am actually experiencing the "west" in all it's glory. GP's version of "stampede" (conviently named Stompede) is in full throttle this weekend!

I am making wicked tips at work.. Paying off my bills... Things are working out well folks.. I could cry sweet tears of joy.

Though it is with bittersweet reluctance I let you know that my baby has been sold... To my brother.. His car was stolen a week before I got to Grande Prairie... It was wrote off... So he is buying my car. That means I could still come visit her, and it's staying in the family.

Lightning storm tonight was beautiful...

A Canadian won the Miss Universe pageant... Here's what this Asshole thought about it.

I worked 10.5 hours on my feet, now I am exhausted and my brain is starting to nap...

So

Good Night.